I sit down, thinking hard at my desk,
my, world seems to be watched over by someone else,
my, breathing deep and heavy, seems to echo,
and I sit to think of a boy sitting at a desk, thinking hard...
Its like a mirrors all around me, are actually glass,
can I transcend into, myself? Just let it pass...
6 comments:
Hi! I'm a student in somewhere around this world. In the poem, it's not easy to rhyme and add the personal feeling. When I write a poem, I just mess it up. Could you give me some hints that I could be more successful in writing the poem?
Thank a lot!
i LOVED it:) good job. i could comment on your every post but i love this one most i think :)
@Visitor - don't try to rhyme just because convention says so - search for a rhythm you want in your words. Slow yourself down when you speak and think, and you'll start observing your own internal style. Thats what you want to throw down.
@Sadie - Thanks for visitng Sadie - The Magic School Bus used to be my all time favorite :)
oe Bomber!
me likes
nice !!! mummy
Nice (:
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